On Thumb Sucking

I previously mentioned my history with this digital obsession/oral fixation. I'd have to ask when I actually started, but I assume it was as a baby. I vaguely remember an attachment to a certain lightweight, white with blue, pink, and yellow stripes baby blanket. Later it was a big, soft, pink blanket, that I still have. I vaguely remember being a child and sneaking into my mother's bed at night. Dad was already (still?) at work and at the risk of waking my mother, I pulled this fluffy, pink, comfort off of the full length mirror it was covering in their room in order to keep warm. It was mine from then on. I have this blanket still. (Though it is missing a large chunk out of the center.) I suppose these days we would call it my "lovey."

For 13 years I sucked my thumb with it in my bed every night. For SHAME! My parents never really pushed the issue. We tried the standard methods of quitting at one time or another. There was: nail polish, band aids, hot sauce, gloves, etc, etc. We never really stuck with anything. Maybe because they knew I needed braces anyway. (My little mouth was too small to hold all my teeth so the incisors were pushed in front of the nearby ones.)

The only thing that finally worked was my actual commitment to quitting. I realized that I was old and it was inappropriate to suck my thumb any longer. It was that simple. I WANTED to stop. I don't much remember being teased or anything for it at slumber parties, but I did try to hide it because it felt..."wrong." One night I took it upon myself to keep my thumb away from my face as I slept. I twined my fingers together and tucked them tightly between my legs. Then...I tossed. And turned. I won't say that I got much sleep that night. But over the course of a few weeks I was able to break the habit. Thanks to thousands of dollars of orthodontia and years of painful braces, my smile leaves no hint of the years my thumb spent pushing my front teeth out of whack. (Thanks Mutti and Paw!)

That brings me to my current charges, R, D, and A. All thumb suckers. (I find it interesting that the boys suck the same thumb and A the opposite.) I have dealt with the removal of pacifier use from a child, but this will be my first experience achieving what I did for myself 19 years ago. I have had other charges with this 'affliction,' but no other parents have taken the jump to break the habit before now.

The triplet's Doctor has recommended we begin weaning them from the thumb. We can see the effect it is having on their teeth. The parents are on board and so is nanny.nora. We started months ago. I stopped allowing them to bring their lovies out of bed. The kids really like to cuddle them and suck when they are around. There was minimal fuss and I was able to divert them successfully until this became a habit.

Next, I stopped letting them suck at any time besides nap/bedtime. I accomplished this by reminding them EVERY time I saw them do it. Yes, I said: ", thumb out," "please don't suck," or "we only suck at nap time" a million times. In fact, I am still saying it now, as D continues to fight the urge. (He's a trickster. Often likes to "pretend" to be napping so he can suck. I've taken to encouraging "pretend" sucking. THAT didn't go over well.)

However, I digress. The third step in our "stop the sucking" brigade, started recently. We have been talking to the kids about how sucking will mess with their teeth. They get the concept, so I moved to putting socks on their hands at nap time. Today was the first try. (12/22/10) A and R had no trouble getting to sleep. However, D tossed and turned for a good hour. He didn't complain, but I could tell it was keeping him from sleeping. eventually I removed the socks and he fell to sleep peacefully, thumb in mouth.

Two out of three, 66%. Not bad, but we'll keep trying. I admit, I have a little soft spot for D. I know how hard it is to quit. However, the socks will go on every day, until he sleeps slackjawed and snoring, WITHOUT that pesky opposable digit suctioned between his lips.

On Pets

You might not like what I'm going to say next. Please avert your eyes if you are a pet lover and want to retain a semblance of respect and love for nanny.nora. I am not a HUGE pet fan. (GASP!) Don't get me wrong. I like a nice snuggle with a cat or dog, but only on my timetable. Like when I can wash my hands or clothes soon after. READ: Allergies and germ/dirt phobia. (I know that's funny coming from someone who deals in snot and poo all day.) Thankfully most of the houses I have worked are kept uber clean and my slight allergies are held at bay with a Claritan and direct-pet-contact-hand-washing. However, since animals, much like children, are never predictable, having a pet in the house is often like adding another kid into the mix. (I should totally be getting pet-pay!) ;-)

My first pet-ercise was the butterscotch lab of the twin boys household. His worst crime was not immediately rushing back in when I called him from outside and barking at the littlest sound. He was kind of a scared-y-dog. (Imagine Scooby Doo, but less cartoony and he didn't talk.) In general he was well behaved around food and the kids, but his high strung nature didn't allow me to relax at all.

The house I currently work in has a collection of pets to contend with. There is the cat. He avoids us at all cost and he loves to terrorize the dog. (It's HYSTERICAL). Honestly, I don't see him till nap time when he comes to get a little rub down and slinks off to sleep in the sun. Our relationship works. My cat allergies are the worst and to be honest, since seeing Cat's Eye, feline's kinda freak me out, so I can totally deal with a little nap time pet and his total domination of the dog. Ah...the dog. This creature is trouble with a capital T. The first day I worked there he wouldn't stop humping my arm while I sat on the floor playing with the children. Within the first week he threw up 5 times (in one day!) and he succeeded in licking an explosive poop out of the high chair. In my almost 2 years with The Cs he has eaten countless diapers and stolen food from plates, hands, and counter-tops. He is a terribly sweet dog, but his misbehavior rivals his disposition with a vengeance.

So the long and short of it is, nanny.nora is all about fish and things that live in cages as pets. If they are loud, make me sneeze, fight trolls who want to steal my soul, or eat the sandwich off my plate, then we're gonna have some issues. ;-)

On Sleepy Time Loveys

It is not uncommon for children to have an attachment to a certain blanket or stuffed animal. These items can provide comfort and confidence when kids are feeling vulnerable. My experience has been that where there is a lovey, there is a thumb sucker. I'm sure this rule doesn't always hold true, but it did for me. Yes, I admit to all of the interweb, I am a thumb sucker. No, I technically don't suck my thumb currently, but I speak in present tense because it is still a part of my history. Though I find no comfort in it now, having sucked my thumb off and on til practically 13 years old, it is still sometimes an instinct when I am feeling particularly stressed or anxious. I even admit to (in desperation) having tried it later in life, but after so many years without, it really doesn't have the same calming effect.

Anyway, back to my kids and their loveys. (We'll continue the thumb sucking talk at a later date.) So these loveys come in many shapes and sizes. There have been a menagerie of cats, an ostrich, lions, tigers, and bears. (Oh my!) These  animals hold a particular importance at sleep times throughout the day. Hence, nanny.nora is a bit strict about daytime removal of loveys from beds. Why? Is it because I'm mean? No... Is it because I like to make kids suffer? No... Honestly, and it may be a selfish reason, but my thoughts are if you bring it out to play you are 100% more likely to lose track of it come nap or bedtime. If nanny.nora hasn't been around all day to see what little corner it got tucked into, there is no chance of my finding with when we REALLY need it. As if it's not stressful enough for kids to be without the comfort of a parent at these uncertain times, they (and I) don't need the stress of a missing lovey that might make the difference between a bumpy bedtime and a severely turbulent and tear-filled one.

Case in point, when I worked for the family of twin boys, each had a matching set of lovey blankets. They were animal heads, elephant and tiger, attached to a little blanket. Each of the boys had two. (This often happens when parents buy 2 of the same loveys to have a "washing time" back up, but somehow the kids always end up with both.)  Bed time came and M was missing 1 of his tiger loveys. We searched high and low. Upstairs. Downstairs. Every toy bucket in the house. Every possible place I could think of -- bathrooms, under couch cushions. And it was a BIG house. I made it a game and we all worked together (thankfully avoiding tears) but unfortunately the second tiger lovey never turned up. I pride myself on being a master of distraction. (A skill every nanny must master.) And I was able to get both boys to bed with minimal sadness and only 1 lovey a piece. Their mother later contacted me with the happy news that Tiger #2 had been located in the infrequently used salad spinner under the sink. Who knows how it ended up there, but yeah, this solidified my opinion that sleepy time loveys live in beds all day and play a night while the kids rest.

Like everything on this blog, it's just my opinion, but it works best for all involved.
Love your nanny, let your kids love their loveys IN BED.